My Journey of Chronic Illness August 16, 2010

Article by Lisa Kraft

In 2005, I realized I hadn’t been feeling well for a long time.  My husband asked what was wrong.  I laughed and said, “Maybe I have cancer and I’m going to die”.  In 2008, after many frustrating doctor appointments, I was finally diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.  There have been times I wished it would have been cancer – at least then I would eventually die.  To someone who does not have a chronic illness, this may sound melodramatic.  But to those who do have a chronic illness, you have probably said or thought the very same thing.

The Center for Disease Control describes my illness as “a debilitating and complex disorder characterized by profound fatigue that is not improved by bed rest and that may be worsened by physical or mental activity.”  I describe it as feeling like I have the flu every single day of my life.  Complete info about CFS can be found at http://www.cdc.gov/cfs/.

Often, all I can do is sit on the couch or lie in bed.  There have been many days where I felt helpless and discouraged.  Feelings of guilt have assaulted me because I had to bow out of many activities, responsibilities, and ministries.  I thought I was being a terrible wife, mother, friend, and Christian.

I finally came to the realization that God has known all along this would be my journey.  I searched my heart and began to draw near to the Lord in prayer.  The Lord has a purpose for me that is authored by Him.  Proverbs 19:21 states, “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”  My plans seemed good, but they were not God’s plans.

I began to come to terms with my illness.  However, I felt resentful towards those around me, especially fellow Christians.  It seemed as though they did not see my need, or that my need was not relevant.  I asked myself, “What do I need”?  It would be great to have friends, family, or church members come and do housework, cook meals, or watch my children for me, but those would only be a temporary balm for my need.  After much thought and prayer, I discovered that in the midst of my illness, my deepest needs are these:

To be BELIEVED:

I need my fellow Christians to accept that what I am telling them is true.  Not blow me off.  Not explain it away.  But listen – and believe.

To be PRAYed for:

I need to feel the freedom that my need is just as great as the next person’s.  I don’t want to feel like I am being labeled as a ‘complainer’ or ‘whiner’ if I ask for prayer when I am struggling.  I need the church to lay hands on me and anoint me with oil and ask God’s healing for me.

To be RELEVANT:

God has a purpose for me.  It may not exactly fit into the mold of what traditional ‘ministry’ looks like.  So I need for my ministry to be relevant to the workings of my church.  If that be a ministry of prayer and encouragement, I would like it be welcomed and valued.

In saying all of that, I understand I must take responsibility in this process.  I am learning to be more transparent, more forgiving, and less self-centered.  I am so glad the Lord leads us gently.  God is focusing my eyes and heart to see the needs of others that I never saw before.  I am learning to listen to the Holy Spirit and pray for people who come to mind.

Circumstances have not changed, but my heart has changed.  I even find myself smiling and laughing more.  I have found a freedom in Christ I did not have before.  A Scripture that encourages my heart is found in 2 Corinthians 4:16-18:  “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.  For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.  So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”

Are you chronically ill?  Are you discouraged?  Are you at the end of yourself?  God truly has a purpose for you.  I encourage you to be vulnerable enough to reach out to those around you.  Be honest.  Be forgiving.  Let your need be known, and in turn be open to another person’s need.  You may find yourself surprised at the marvelous story God has authored for you.

Bio:

Lisa Kraft resides in Bismarck , ND .  She is very happily married to a supportive husband who is her best friend.  She is the mother of 2 delightful boys.  Her hobbies include bird-watching, reading, Junior Bible Quiz, and visiting with family and friends.  She has been diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis.  Her 8-year old son has Type 1 Diabetes.

For encouragement in the face of chronic illness, visit http://restministries.com/.

Prepared for Action July 7, 2010

This morning I was challenged by this scripture in I Peter 4:1,2 – “Therefore since Christ has suffered in His body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God.”

I don’t know about you, but when I am prepared for something, I handle it so much better. To arm myself means to be prepared for action, fit, and ready. This implies I have not been taken by surprise because I am prepared for trials and difficulties. Verse one goes on to read, “…he who has suffered in his body is done with sin.” We can overcome sin when we focus on Christ and what He wants us to do.

Just wanted to pass on my thoughts.

You are my heart,

Kelly

Intentional Thinking June 9, 2010

This is an exciting day!  This blog is designed to help us stay in touch, encourage, motivate, and share our stories with one another…simply put, it’s life together.

So grab a cup of  coffee, diet coke, or tea, and let’s begin taking a bit of time for Life Together. “As iron sharpens iron so one man (or woman) sharpens another.” Proverbs 27:17.

When our oldest son was two, the exercise series, “Buns of Steel,” had just come out and was quite popular.  I of course had my copy of the video so I could exercise and look just like the lady on the video cover.  Didn’t happen, but anyway, I digress.

I would have to say I must have been a little obsessive over this issue because shortly after my purchase of this exercise video, my son and I were standing in line at the grocery store, and standing in front of us was a lady from church.  Our son looked at her and asked, “Do you have buns of steel (meaning the video!)?”  The woman graciously laughed and said, “No I have buns of jello!” Needless to say, I was quite embarrassed and so thankful the lady took it all in stride and joked about it.

Since that time, I have purchased and used several types of exercise DVD’s and equipment.  Still haven’t reached my goal, but that’s for another day and another blog.  Our society has put an extraordinarily  high value on the way we look. The thing it would have us believe is, “If you aren’t a perfect ten, honey, you are worth nothing.”Sadly enough, this thought has been swallowed hook, line and sinker by thousands of women. Truth be told, it has been one of my greatest ongoing battles.

While (still) trying to get back into shape, I have realized this is a battle I must win.  Whatever I choose to fill my mind with will affect the way I act and think.  Here is a case in point:

Sunday was a gorgeous day here in Fort Collins.  After church, I decided to go to the pool swim a little and relax a lot!  As I arrived at the pool, I can see there are many people there… many in shape people. My first thought was to turn around and go back home.  But I am determined this is not going to get the best of me, so I told myself, “I’m going to be confident and I’m going to enjoy this…even if it kills me!”  And that’s exactly what I did and it didn’t kill me.  It was my first step in retraining my mind. What a session huh?

I Timothy 4:7 – 8 “Have nothing to do with godless myths and old wives tales; rather TRAIN yourself to be godly. For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come.”

An interesting thought struck me while reading this. In exercise, there is something called, “Muscle Memory.”  This simply means a person has to vary their exercise routine in order for their muscles to continue to tone and grow. The same exercises repeated over and over again don’t challenge our muscles to develop past where they are and so they plateau.

Our brain is much the same way. If we continue to feed wives tales and godless myths to our minds, our mind will eventually become accustomed to believing them without considering the fact it isn’t in agreement with God’s Word. You are worth nothing if…you aren’t a perfect 10, you don’t have a great job, you don’t make enough money, you aren’t married…what is your IF?  Before we know it not only do we believe these falsehoods, they affect the way we think and even act!

Training implies ongoing work and study, continued learning, not plateauing.  It is developing the habits, thoughts, or behavior of a person by discipline and instruction. Above I said, “this was the first step in retraining my mind…” I have to be intentional about what I allow myself to think.  Right thinking comes from the Word of God. His Word is the only thing that has value for ALL things and holds promise for this life AND the life to come.

Once when I had finished speaking on this subject, a woman came up to me  and said, “Kelly we already know all of this.”  We may know it in our knower, but do we believe it?  Remember, what we believe translates into how we act and think.

My prayer for each one of us is that because we have spent time in the word, our lives will literally be food for others. It is the Word that has value for ALL things.

Hello Ladies! June 9, 2010

Hello Ladies!

I must admit I am a little bit nervous as I have never had a blog before. I’m just going to jump in with both feet and have quite a time.  Ever since going to the movie Julie & Julia, I have thought blogging was something I would really enjoy.  Of course, I even thought cooking from Julia Child’s cook book would be something I would like as well.  One thing at a time!

Just pop in to say hello and we’ll go from there!  Tomorrow is a new day and a new post.  We can keep in touch with one another and I will try my hand at posting some upcoming WM events.

Blessings on each of you!  Let’s embark on this journey of life together!

Kelly